deathboy | (no subject)

Just waking up and looking at pulling the photos and video from the weekend together to do a write-up, and I find a couple of gems in my Myspace inbox from some boy-child in Germany:

----------------- (1st message ) -----------------

some very nice tunes on your site!

i am a local german dj and would like to ask for a promo cd

think i could do my part to help promote your music here - maybe you see a possibility

all the best and thanks in advance!

till

----------------- (2 days later) -----------------

an answer would be nice

regards

till

----------------- (I reply) -----------------

Hi there,

I'm afraid that because of the high volume of spam, I don't check my myspace address daily.

I assume that English isn't your first language, in which case, you might not realise that using the phrase "an answer would be nice", following a request for freebies, comes across as rude and passive-aggressive. It might be more polite to say something like "Hi, I wonder if you got a chance to read my recent message? I look forward to your reply".

If you could drop me some details of clubs that you play, I'll pass them along to our record label, and hopefully they'll get a CD out to you / put you on their mailing list.

thanks for getting in touch,

-=Scott=-

----------------- (He gets back to me) -----------------

there is something called 'dick' in my underwear - so it's redundant to tell me how i have to (!!!) write u and which phrases are ok for you*lol

just use the 'spam-button' to avoid any friend-requests of fake bitches and wannabes here - just a little hint for you

furthermore: if you have nothing to say who gets promo material or not...it's just a matter of time i'll find your music on some russian sites ;D

best

t.

----------------- (Tata, thanks for playing...) -----------------

Really?

I can't imagine that you get to use it very much.

I do get to add people to our promo list, that was a polite way of saying that I don't believe you DJ anywhere and you're not getting a free CD.

Our music is already on peer to peer sites, that's unavoidable these days. I'd worry more if it wasn't. If you can't afford to buy a CD, perhaps you could download one from the pirate bay instead of begging for free copies like a child.

Blocked and banned, don't cry too hard, little one.

-----------------

I'm getting old, I should have called him a cunt and blocked him after the 2nd email.

It's exchanges like this that make me want to hang myself. They outnumber the people who get in touch just to say how much they loved a track.

I'm going back to bed.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

hehehehee

off to go look for your hen night pix

DEAR SIR,

MY PRESIDENT IS STUCK IN JAIL, AND NO LONGER ABLE TO ACCESSS HIS MILLLIONS. THE ONLY WAY TO GET HIM OUT IS TO BRIBE HIS CAPTORS, WHO LIKE YOUR MUSIC.

IF YOU BEE SENDING FREE CD'S TO THEM, MY PRESIDENT MINISTER WILL BE SHARING HIS BILLIOSN WITH URSELF.

YOUR'S GREEDILY.

PS I HAVE A DICK IN MY PANTS

AND I'M NOT AFRAID TO USE IT

BOTH INCHES!

(deleted comment)

And there I was thinking that I was having issues with depth perception.

phew.

http://url.ie/205o

:)

the back catalogue is mostly available from:

http://deathboy.anti-goth.com/

hope that's of use!

I was about to say, if he can't find your stuff online at anti-goth, he just isn't trying.

I need to do a site redesign so it's more obvious, i reckon

Put the URL at the bottom of any CD requests, see if anyone picks up on it.

The "HA! Found your secret music stash" replies will be golden.

If any of them managed to find it.

ohhhh, wow, feller - I think that one predates my extensive (but still finite) records!

sorry 'bout that... I'd clean forgotten that version!

definitely, man, you remember a version that I neither have nor remembered ;)

there is something called 'dick' in my underwear - so it's redundant to tell me how i have to (!!!) write u and which phrases are ok for you*lol

Translation:
A being named Richard (possibly "Rickert", being German) is in this person's underwear (parasitic twin? QUAID, START THE REACTOR) and acts as an ineffectual spellchecker or pants-based babelfish.

Poor guy :(

So he knows how to write and yet needs to be told how his phrasing could be taken wrong? Sure. . .

He's just a rude, arrogant shit-head, it seems.

I'd assumed as much, I just try to be polite on the 1st reply these days.

He's just a ~~rude, arrogant shit-head~~ German, it seems.

Fixed for greater ~~truth~~ ~~justice~~ stereotypical lols.

Und for you... ze Cooler.

I do know some germans who come across that way, but don't actually mean to (and a few that come across that way, realise how upsetting it is and couldn't give a hot, shiny fuck), hence some initial politeness.

But ja. whattadork.

One of those whose tale becomes funny to tell afterwards but at the time you just want to wring his miserable neck for wasting your time and energy. Kill..

FICTIONAL DICK ATTACHED TO REAL LIFE DICK SHOCKER - do not pass go, do not collect £100, pass directly to spam trap in future...

I'm sorry.

some very nice wanker insulting on your site!

i am a local american wanker and would like to ask for a promo insult

think i could do my part to help promote your ranting here - maybe you see a possibility

all the best and thanks in advance!

christoph

ooookay then, because an attitude like that is DEFINITELY going to get you a promo CD.

& most of your backcatalogue IS already online, clearly he fails in the Google department.