i'm sad to hear that *hug* and totally sympathize. i've been off anti-depressants for about 10 years (and been on an emotional roller coaster ever since)... i have friends who have been on those for years (one has a "cocktail"! yeesh) with no chance of ever getting off. i have a psych degree and even i don't like drugs. i think therapy is better (not that insurance covers it). [i assume the doctor you are talking about is a GP and not a psychiatrist or neurologist?]

and alcohol *is* a depressant. chances are you'll see some benefit from cutting back drink.

best of luck to you!