deathboy: (Default)
[personal profile] deathboy
I am the Magical Uncaring Bastard.

Corben has already learnt that Liz is more caring and pleasant than me. She recently put him down for a nap and he cried and cried and cried and cried.

She then suggests I have a go, as we have noticed that if put to bed by me, he gives up quicker, because he knows I am heartless and spiteful and will not return despite his wailing.

So, I go through, he's crying. Pick him up, he's crying. Cuddle and shush him for a few minutes. The crying gets worse. Put him down again, put his blankey over him, unceremoniously perch a toy rabbit on his head and leave the room.

Barely 30 seconds later, he's happily asleep.

It's good to be a bastard.

Date: 2007-12-31 05:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cavalorn.livejournal.com
*takes notes*

Date: 2007-12-31 06:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whizzerandchips.livejournal.com
As a father to an 18 and a 16 year old, I can tell you with some conviction that Good cop Bad cop really does work. Oddly, being Bad cop was a major problem for me when they were about 10. Now it's not because they hate us equally... ;)

Date: 2007-12-31 06:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] deathboy.livejournal.com
*grins*

yepyep ... I've totally seen that we all benefit from having different approaches :) I don't mind being a swine to him currently (he forgets these indignities so quickly at the mo :))... I'm guessing it's going to get harder as he grows...

Date: 2007-12-31 06:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whizzerandchips.livejournal.com
Nah. It's OK. Sometimes a bit stern, sometimes a cuddler. Everything in equal measure. Give them enough rope and they'll drag you to a better world. Kids are fucking fantastic. Not all the time. But most of the time. Do what feels right, not what anyone says, play it by feel, like the modulation wheel. You'll know when it's time for more, for none, and for a little.

Happy New Year.

Date: 2007-12-31 07:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] deathboy.livejournal.com
cheers, man, and you! :)

The "Fatherhood" manual ...

Date: 2007-12-31 06:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] btripp.livejournal.com
Chapter XVII - Concerning Cruelty And Clemency, And Whether It Is Better To Be Loved Than Feared (http://www.constitution.org/mac/prince17.htm)

THAT is the single most useful bit of writing that a new father could ever get his desperate, frustrated, sleep-deprived hands on.

The rest of the book's pretty useful ... all of it can be grabbed HERE (http://www.constitution.org/mac/prince00.htm).


Image (http://www.btripp.com)



Re: The "Fatherhood" manual ...

Date: 2007-12-31 07:40 pm (UTC)
reddragdiva: (domesticity)
From: [personal profile] reddragdiva
I've worked out a much better arrangement: I'm the pushover, and [livejournal.com profile] arkady's the stern one. That way I get to be Soppy Daddy With A Daughter!

Date: 2007-12-31 07:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hauntedunix.livejournal.com
This, I assume, is excluding the 'brick', 'rohypnol', 'choloform', or 'brick', methodology? ;)

(Yes, doublebrick)

Date: 2007-12-31 07:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dredpiratebunny.livejournal.com
youre parenting skillz are rad.
(:3

Date: 2007-12-31 08:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kohai.livejournal.com
unceremoniously perch a toy rabbit on his head and leave the room

*dies laughing at mental imagery*

Date: 2007-12-31 11:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shesmymonkey.livejournal.com
Make sure if she's gonna be the one staying in more when he's older to be the sort-of-at-home-parent, that Corben knows he can't walk over her, though.

Heh, evil parenting! Will make notes like Cav.

Date: 2007-12-31 11:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] squidgyfishlove.livejournal.com
I seem to have a similar effect on Ewan. I'm not so sure if he's actually just giving up and assuming I won't come back (because sometimes I do, usually just to pile more stuff on him though) or if it's just *that much better* by comparison after I put him down. Either way... yeah. Babies are ... well I was going to say fun, but I try not to lie too often and I've already filled my quota for today by pretending to want to be at work.

Date: 2008-01-01 01:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aoakley.livejournal.com
Large bottle of milk, then all three verses of Sing A Song Of Sixpence, sung through three times, followed by Classic FM on very quiet with a twenty minute sleep timer. Job done, usually.

I'm usually good cop, although I pay less attention to her whining. Mummy is bad cop, in so far as she tells her off more, although Annabel has taken to simply wagging her finger back at Mummy and actually saying "blah blah blah blah" (you go, girl).

Annabel's main sleep problems (ie. causes of distress) are silence and darkness. Since we live Out In The Sticks, there are no streetlights, no noisy neighbours and rarely any passing cars. Essentially, there is a fine line between "cot" and "isotank", and it is understandably frightening to fall asleep in the former and wake up wondering whether you're in the latter.

Nightlights aren't good for babies' eyes, and I can't sleep overnight if there's lights left on, so we tend to turn off all the upstairs lights when I go to bed, and just hope she doesn't wake up before daylight - more difficult in winter months.

Date: 2008-01-01 05:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mechanicaljack.livejournal.com
See, it's not about being a magical uncaring bastard, it's about the kid knowing how far they can push you. When you lay it down, even at that young an age, that what you say is what you mean and whatnot, the trying to push your boundaries thing ends pretty quick. Like raptors, they'll obviously still poke around for weak points, so you can't ever drop your guard. :P
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