bad deed for the day

[deathboy]

Well, I think I've just been a cunt to somebody rather badly.

BUT, I remain convinced that they were a larger cunt.

Allow me to explain:

Taking Corben to playgroup today, I pop into Tesco. I spend a few quid on some cartons of juice and some snacks to eat on the way.

I walk past a guy taking donations for some child-cancer charity.

Now, I'm broke, and payday is in a few days. I give to charity, not like it's anybody's business if/how/when. I'm neither a big-hearted philanthropist, nor a scrooge. Like most people, I assume.

I've got earphones in, and I'm pushing a pram at speed as I'm in a hurry. I take a wide berth around the guy and don't make eye-contact with him.

That, right there, is your clear sign that I DO NOT WISH TO DONATE THANKS.

He turns around, tracking me as I pass, trying to make eye contact, and goes from:

"Donation for kids cancer charity, mate?"

to

"Kids, mate?"

"Little kids, mate - kids with cancer!" - as I pass by.

Enough! Fuck this.

I turn around, tell him "Would you stop hassling people as they go by, please?"

Turn on my heel, march Corben out of Tesco.

Fucker follows me up out into the carpark and up the street.

"Excuse me! OY! Excuse Me! EXCUSE ME!! EXCUSE ME!!!" (x10)

Have to say, I thought he'd relent. He did not. He catches up with me.

"Have you ever had a kid in great Ormond's Street hospital, dying of cancer? EH?? WELL I HAVE! PEOPLE LIKE YOU MAKE ME SICK!"

Then he turns on his heel and fucks off.

I get out of the car-park and am really not fucking happy at all.

Soooooo, inevitably, I turn around and walk back IN to fucking Tesco, go to customer services, ask for a manager and explain what just happened.

A dear old Cockerny Grandma behind me in the queue added veracity to my claims with a cheerful

"Yeah! I seen 'im doing that, comin' after yer up the car park, I thought it was right out of order!"

ANYWAYS, the manageress that rocked up was immediately aghast that the guy would engage me, let alone chase after me. She apologised and immediately went and asked him to leave (am really glad she was sympathetic as I was a bit shaky and not really up for another confrontation).

I fucked off pronto, lest the fucker decided he wanted another go at me. Cowardly? Yep, but you can't fight very well with a pram in tow.

So that's probably just taken some geezer who's kid died and who gave up his monday to look for charitable donations for the hospital she spent her last months in, and kicked him right in the cock.

But fuck it. No. You don't fucking hassle people like that. If you can't be polite and good-tempered with the public, find another way to donate to your charity, man. Do a voluntary admin role. Go on a fun-run.

Pick something where you won't have to run in to cunts like me because the world's fucking chock-full of them.

Comments

[kotenok.livejournal.com]

Aside from anything else, what he did is illegal. Charity collecters aren't allowed to solicit for money, not even to shake a tin under your nose.

[whizzerandchips.livejournal.com]

This.

[strawberryfrog.livejournal.com]

PEOPLE LIKE YOU MAKE ME SICK!

If broke people make him sick, then he must be some kind of c**t lacking in basic human decency.

[deathboy.livejournal.com]

i'm sure he probably thought I was objecting to all charity, as opposed to a single instance of overly-invasive behaviour.

which is all well and good, but he needs to find a different role that doesn't bring him into contact with people who might not find his brand of enthusiasm very pleasant.

[strawberryfrog.livejournal.com]

i'm sure he probably thought I was objecting to all charity

Well, yes. If "thought" is the right word for it.

[lineoutrecords.livejournal.com]

As promised. Entire blog is good both for comedy and general social injustices. His podcast makes me laugh like a cunt.

http://michaelleggesblog.blogspot.com/2009/11/wheely-awful.html

[deathboy.livejournal.com]

keryoink!

[voofy.livejournal.com]

you were in the right, and he was in the wrong

next time one of them hassles me (and they *all* hassle me - there's something about the tiedye clothing) i'd li,e to borrow you to have a word with them

[deathboy.livejournal.com]

thankya, duck.

:)

I'm pretty certain I was singled out because of the pram. "Kids, mate. KIDS. LITTLE KIDDIES. WITH CANCER!!!"

i get it more if my hair's dyed, too, they just know students and alternatives are a soft touch.

[fire-brand.livejournal.com]

Meh, he sounds like a cunt. You don't get permission to act like a cunt even if you are doing it for a good cause.

[deathboy.livejournal.com]

mmm. I don't think he should be in that position, potentially interacting with a public who are not, sadly, all going to agree with him and donate immediately (and be happy to be harassed... in a good cause).

I think most folks would feel intimidated by having a decently-sized male stranger stride after them up the road, shouting at 'em.

at least, that's what I tell myself for grassing up a fucking charity worker.

[fire-brand.livejournal.com]

You're absolutely right, if a dude ran after me in a supermarket car park I'd call the police on them - I think you did them a favour by only talking to customer services.

[deathboy.livejournal.com]

I was going to phone his charity, but I thought twice... being moved on from Tesco won't preclude him helping the charity in future, whereas complaining directly might have. was shaking like a bloody leaf afterwards though :P

[deathboy.livejournal.com]

I don't know, I kind of thought it was possible, myself, I have to say.

I don't like to think the worst, either, but for all I know, he wasn't a volunteer, but someone who does it as a (very low-paying) job.

He wasn't interested in a conversation, so it's not something I'll ever know :P

[deathboy.livejournal.com]

He did go into immediate confrontation, I had to walk away steaming for five minutes before going back to complain, he went from my original complaint (to him) to following a stranger up the street, shouting.

I certainly think it's possible he was full of shit, but I've no information really :P

[adamw]

This.

[mattp.livejournal.com]

As someone who has both had a cancerous tumour and been treated by GOSH, I still think he's a cunt and would likely have reacted in a way similar to your own.

[deathboy.livejournal.com]

I would have quite loved to have had you about for the possible replies, but as I tried to begin telling him that my wife lost her mom to it a few years back, he cut me off, wasn't interested in Cancer Death Top Trumps, he obviously had the winning card.

[smarriveurr.livejournal.com]

Yeah - I'm unemployed, and now 'tis the season where I try to avoid eye contact with charity solicitors. People need to accept that A) you might not have anything you can afford to give, and B) You might not be fucking comfortable putting money in a tin held by some stranger who claims to be collecting for a charity. It's not just selfish dicks who try to avoid bellringers and canshakers. Sorry, I grew up in a bad area, and when I'm employed again and going to donate, I'll do it directly to an organization's office, not just hand some guy money on the assumption he's an honest, caring volunteer who will not skim nor steal.

If he lost his kid, sure, that's tragic. If he can't manage to be a decent human being while soliciting donations, though, if he can't be calm about it, you're damn right, he shouldn't be doing it. Repeatedly hassling passersby might net an extra couple quid by the end of the day out of pure discomfort and guilt, but it's not likely to make anyone more charitable.

[kest]

He doesn't know a thing about you, and he should realize that....I mean, let's just say you *did* have a kid with cancer (god forbid). And you are out shopping with your other little one, stressed to death. The first thing you are going to want to do is donate to a cancer charity, right? Nuh-uh, all your money is already going into the hospital, most likely, and the last thing you'd need is another reminder.

That guy made some big assumptions about you, that rather than having issues of your own, that you were instead some kind of unfeeling heartless jerk - but in reality it is his compassion that was lacking, not yours.

[miss_squiddy]

This.

[pete23.livejournal.com]

i think you need to fashion new handles for your pram from his child's femurs. but that's just my reasonable side.

[megashrike.livejournal.com]

I like how I give to charity, by not dealing with anyone. I'll do it through subscriptions or online donations or god forbid a charity event.

The panhandling technique of a lot of them on the street does my tits in, I've seen better behaved homeless people selling the Big Issue.

[quercus.livejournal.com]

You know why Big Issue vendors are so well behaved?
Because it's their money. It's also their pitch, so tomorrow it's going to be their money too.

If you're a student twat making some extra trust-fund top-up money and carbon-offsetting your flight to Goa by chugging for "Pandas against Whaling", then you can risk pissing off the marks. Embarrass a few more into giving, wind up the odd Deathboy, and you're still ahead on the day's taking. Make them hate the charity and it's just not your problem - you get to walk away at the end of the day.


Whilst I admire the creativity of femur pram handles, I think this certainly warrants a stamp and a letter to Tesco. I really hate chuggers that corner their prey by the checkouts. I've got the chutzpah to walk rudely past them, but then I'm not having to do it with a pram in tow.

[deathboy.livejournal.com]

thankya, darlin'. :)

Am sure I could have handled myself better at the time, too, but it was being hassled that piqued my blood pressure in the first place. a situation with no winnars :P

[incarnated-joy.livejournal.com]

...hello Cloney, see scarily similar scenario below ;)

P.S. Got your invite :D

[deathboy.livejournal.com]

*nodsnods*

when you're working off goodwill, you have to maintain it at all times :/

[incarnated-joy.livejournal.com]

Isn't what he did soliciting for money? I'm quite sure it is. Even if it's not, wow, what an ass. I really hate the pushy charity folk, especially when I am trying to get from A to B and end up having to go through every alphabet of the letter to dodge the vultures with clipboards who WILL follow you unless you tell them to fuck off. I give money to several organisations already so my response is always "Sorry mate I already give" and try to keep walking. I've had two people in the past month say "that's what they all say" in a really confrontational manner. I've yet to turn round and kick their shins in with my capped boots, but it's tempting.

Although the prize for "dick of the year award" goes to the one guy who tried to make me feel bad for not giving money to a disabled children charity. While I pushed my quite clearly disabled younger brother in his wheelchair. Apparently my not giving "under the circumstances" made me "even worse of a person". And that's when my brother reached up and put a quid in his tin, for the kids not fortunate enough to have their big sister donate their personal time, money and the best part of a decade towards looking after them. I bloody love that little bugger.

You might have acted a bit of a dick mate, but that cunt had it coming.

[jasontheknight.livejournal.com]

Never put money in tins.

If your conscience has been pricked go home and put the same amount of money into the charity via their website / Justgiving or whatever - then they get Gift Aid too.

Of course if you're a scrounging dole scum ™ then feel free to put your filthy 2ps in the tin.

I vote Deathboy on this one.

[kelvinator.livejournal.com]

People randomly snap at chuggers, give them shit for no reason and are generally fairly aggressive - and that still doesn't give this guy an excuse.

Re: I vote Deathboy on this one.

[deathboy.livejournal.com]

cheers, matey.

I know I don't come out of it having necessarily handled it the best I could have (just ignoring the fucker in the first place would have been best, I guess), but I feel like less of a rotter seeing that most folks think the guy pushed it all too far.

[ephemera.livejournal.com]

Dude - extra points for braving the return visit to let the manager know what was going on - that's well beyond reasonable, and right out through into flat-out-threatening behaviour!

Hope the altercation didn't freak C out too much.

[deathboy.livejournal.com]

thanks, hon - he was fine, thankfully! If he'd been upset, I think that would have made me just swallow my feelings and get out of it, I feel dead vulnerable in any confrontation when he's about, you can't just do a runner if it goes nasty :P My general up-for-the-crack demeanour disappears like smoke when I have him to think of.

I know I partially went back because I was full of adrenaline, but a good part of me was incensed that he was going to go back to potentially hassling people, having just followed someone up the street.

wangs!

[jaketherat.livejournal.com]

I have you one-upped in the cunty stakes. Not me personally, but Dog did I laugh.

Farringdon station, as anyone who has worked in the area knows, is like a red light district for chuggers. You see the same rent-a-guilt-trip-for-£9-per-hour twats wearing a different coloured tunic every day of the week. If that weren't enough to make you feel cynical then just take a look at the numbers*.

Anyway, one day they're collecting for the National Deaf Children's Society. They try to stop the guy walking in front of me and he comes back, quick as a flash, with "I'm alright mate, don't much like deaf kids". The look on the chugger's face was one I'll remember for decades!


*Fair disclosure, Croydon Hounslow is me.

[echo-echo.livejournal.com]

While some are able to help out, some are either unable, unwilling or choose to offer to charities by a way or means. But it is a persons right to do so as they wish. I cannot abide militant charities aiming at soft targets or guilt tripping people into giving.

I don't know who this guy was, whether he had a personal connection there (in which case if he is emotionally unable to restrain himself he shouldn't be dealing with such a frontline activity) or whether he was being a downright confrontational cunt but either way, what he did is unacceptable. He knew nothing of your personal situation so to impress upon you like that was outrageous. You could have lost a child to cancer and couldn't bear dealing with him, were on the verge of financial meltdown, anything. He hadn't a clue.

There are strict guidelines on what people can and cannot do regarding collection. Most charities are very strict with this in making sure any collectors are well briefed in this and abide by the rules governing it. It is sad to see that on this occasion somebody took it upon themselves to really cross the line...following you out of the store and verbally harassing you was bang out of order.

I think you were absolutely right to do what you did.

[karohemd.livejournal.com]

I don't blame you at all. I'm the same, I can't stand being harassed because I want to decide when and where to donate to charity.
That reminds me, as I missed Dragonmeet this year, I need to figure out who to donate my annual big chunk.

[smarriveurr.livejournal.com]

I love the folks who randomly come up to you when you're stressed the fuck out and need a puff, and want to tell you all about how bad it is for you. "Oh, really? I've been living under a fucking rock all these years. I didn't know it was unhealthy! Well, that's the last of that then!"

My personal hero was a fellow I knew in Germany. Out on the street, a woman came up into his personal space, pointed at his cigarette, and screeched "That'll kill you, you know!"

So he blinked, held it out, threw it as far as he could into the street... then shook out and lit up a fresh one. "Goodness, thank you, ma'am! I can never tell which are the bad ones!"

[quercus.livejournal.com]

I'm going to take up smoking just to get a chance to use that line 8-)

I suggest writing in to The Chap with it.

[smarriveurr.livejournal.com]

But would they accept the tale, given the witticism originates with the Hun in his heathen land?

[mhengla.livejournal.com]

Honestly - the man crossed a line. I've gone through losing a kid, and it doesn't make me want to go and harrass everyone who doesn't want to help out with a cause I'm in to. You did nothing wrong and he was a complete dick for trying to make you feel like you did something bad just because you were broke and couldn't give him 50p for whichever of the million kids cancer charitys he was out there for. I'm pretty sure that if the charity knew how he was trying to collect money, they'd distance themselves from his bullying tactics so fast he wouldn't have time to see the backlash coming 'fore it smacked him down. You did no wrong - now stop guilt tripping yourself and go to bed!!

[mechanicaljack.livejournal.com]

I like to believe I'm an overly nice person, and in light of that, you were not in the wrong.

He isn't helping charity by being an asshole in his collection attempts. He was obviously a maladjusted human in my opinion, simply because he had to have the last word in the situation, whereas you were happy to ask him to stop hassling you, and even ended with a please.

His personal experiences do not give him a license to accost people.

[tenshikurai9.livejournal.com]

ACLU representative on Newbury St., Boston, U.S., took my statement of, I'll go to your web site later tonight, and just let me down the street.

Petitioner a few years ago at Quincy Center Station, Quincy, MA, U.S., who was trying to gain signatures to change something about how the state government is run after I read the entire sheet and told him I don't know enough to sign, an unkind way of saying, thanks a lot lady.

Maybe I should have said a quip to the petioner.