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deathboyBah.
Booze makes me mope.
I've been realising that I've slowly forgotten my ludicrous dreams for the future in favour of more achievable things, all of which has made me feel sickeningly mature.
The things I truly want are HEREBY DECLARED!
---
* A house on a beach with a pool with a tunnel to a cave half full of water with ported sound (Massive Attack - Karmacoma - ON LOOP) looking out on a public beach (so I can see happy people, not for perving - I have plans for that) on a perfect blue ocean. Golden sand. Deep blue sea. Weird pink umbrellas in cocktails served by a spanish bar-guy called 'Juan Sanchez' who accepts the abuse of his name that's thrown at him in deference to the million dollars a month he's paid.
* Regular features on MTV in a new series called "What Scott's not being arsed with at the moment" - a fascinating series focussing on the enormous amount of things that I consider doing then really can't be fucking bothered with. Featuring my internal dialogue (DVD version only) explaining why it's not essential and how I can probably get away with having (another) wank and blaming it on Jason.
* Knowing that some cunts in suits wish they were me (which they do anyway... but more so... )
* Getting married with Massive Attack FEATURING TRICKY (who I will bitch-slap into getting on with them again) playing a live version of Karmacoma NOT FUCKING FEATURING THAT TWAT PRETENDING TO BE TRICKY WITH A REALLY USELESS DEEP JAMAICAN ACCENT. Because, you know, Tricky's not actually Jamaican. He's just some twat from england. like me. but with more money. and talent. and a gravelly voice. and he fucked martine. bastard.
* Seeing my teeming legions of death-children swarming over the banks of the USA, smothering the natives, fisting any republicans they find, reclaiming the USA in the name of... oh, I don't know... THE NATIVE PEOPLE WHO FUCKING LIVED THERE BEFORE OUR COLONIAL REJECTS TURNED UP WITH GUNS AND NO FOOD.
* Peace... love... good will to all men who look like me.
* The pope taking up duty as my TV-channel-changer... he's welcome to say what he wants during his duties, but he'll get a slap if he's out of line, and I hope he likes Moving Shadow.
* Turkish delight. For EVERYONE. fucking fawns.
* No-one is ever allowed to EVER leave without me if they enter a shop with me. I just realised I have a fucked up problem with that since it happened to me a few times when I was a kid and now apparently, I get freaked out if Liz fucks off while we're shopping. Well, frankly, my shopping interests are better than yours and I'm not messed up or anything, so if we walk into a shop you should STAY WITHIN SIGHT or not be suprised if I wig the fuck out when I can't see you after a few minutes. SHE LOOKED LIKE GRANDMA BUT SHE WASN'T! I WAS SCARED!!! I'm like that. Deal with it.
* Richard D James and Trent Reznor to be declared as rulers of the UK and US respectively. Now... just think about this... cool for AGES... UNTIL THEY FALL OUT... *THEN* it'd be fun! haha!
* Trifle as the precursor to every meal.
* People to shut up about glowing clothes and Sisters and corsets. We're goths. Shut up, twatface. Take your speed and dance.
* Vodka for God.
* OBEY.
that is all.
Booze makes me mope.
I've been realising that I've slowly forgotten my ludicrous dreams for the future in favour of more achievable things, all of which has made me feel sickeningly mature.
The things I truly want are HEREBY DECLARED!
---
* A house on a beach with a pool with a tunnel to a cave half full of water with ported sound (Massive Attack - Karmacoma - ON LOOP) looking out on a public beach (so I can see happy people, not for perving - I have plans for that) on a perfect blue ocean. Golden sand. Deep blue sea. Weird pink umbrellas in cocktails served by a spanish bar-guy called 'Juan Sanchez' who accepts the abuse of his name that's thrown at him in deference to the million dollars a month he's paid.
* Regular features on MTV in a new series called "What Scott's not being arsed with at the moment" - a fascinating series focussing on the enormous amount of things that I consider doing then really can't be fucking bothered with. Featuring my internal dialogue (DVD version only) explaining why it's not essential and how I can probably get away with having (another) wank and blaming it on Jason.
* Knowing that some cunts in suits wish they were me (which they do anyway... but more so... )
* Getting married with Massive Attack FEATURING TRICKY (who I will bitch-slap into getting on with them again) playing a live version of Karmacoma NOT FUCKING FEATURING THAT TWAT PRETENDING TO BE TRICKY WITH A REALLY USELESS DEEP JAMAICAN ACCENT. Because, you know, Tricky's not actually Jamaican. He's just some twat from england. like me. but with more money. and talent. and a gravelly voice. and he fucked martine. bastard.
* Seeing my teeming legions of death-children swarming over the banks of the USA, smothering the natives, fisting any republicans they find, reclaiming the USA in the name of... oh, I don't know... THE NATIVE PEOPLE WHO FUCKING LIVED THERE BEFORE OUR COLONIAL REJECTS TURNED UP WITH GUNS AND NO FOOD.
* Peace... love... good will to all men who look like me.
* The pope taking up duty as my TV-channel-changer... he's welcome to say what he wants during his duties, but he'll get a slap if he's out of line, and I hope he likes Moving Shadow.
* Turkish delight. For EVERYONE. fucking fawns.
* No-one is ever allowed to EVER leave without me if they enter a shop with me. I just realised I have a fucked up problem with that since it happened to me a few times when I was a kid and now apparently, I get freaked out if Liz fucks off while we're shopping. Well, frankly, my shopping interests are better than yours and I'm not messed up or anything, so if we walk into a shop you should STAY WITHIN SIGHT or not be suprised if I wig the fuck out when I can't see you after a few minutes. SHE LOOKED LIKE GRANDMA BUT SHE WASN'T! I WAS SCARED!!! I'm like that. Deal with it.
* Richard D James and Trent Reznor to be declared as rulers of the UK and US respectively. Now... just think about this... cool for AGES... UNTIL THEY FALL OUT... *THEN* it'd be fun! haha!
* Trifle as the precursor to every meal.
* People to shut up about glowing clothes and Sisters and corsets. We're goths. Shut up, twatface. Take your speed and dance.
* Vodka for God.
* OBEY.
that is all.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2003-03-27 07:06 pm (UTC)and i still think whiskey is better than vodka anyday!
Re:
Date: 2003-03-27 07:21 pm (UTC):D
no subject
Date: 2003-03-28 05:39 am (UTC)when do i get a copy to spooge over and over again!
jesus, multiple orgasms and i can't touched anything!
hallaleuah!
no subject
Date: 2003-03-27 07:18 pm (UTC)Re:
Date: 2003-03-27 07:20 pm (UTC)bastard.
no subject
5 squillion LJ updates in a day...something's wrong here ;)
Vodka for God ...
Date: 2003-03-27 10:19 pm (UTC)Nice one - bless you my child
- God
no subject
Fuck me I just found religion!!!
Scott you the man,we must have a whee worship to the bottled messiah at whitby
x
no subject
Date: 2003-03-28 01:45 am (UTC)you forgot the midgets :< won't somebody please think of the midgets?
no subject
Date: 2003-03-28 08:12 am (UTC)that is the absolute best quote ever!
no subject
Date: 2003-03-28 08:51 am (UTC)