God's Cock

If you're making a statue of Jesus, right, and it's not wearing anything to cover its modesty, how does one go about choosing the size of the Lord's Wang?

I mean, them there Christians seem to be mighty hung up about sex, so it would be understandable that you might seek to draw attention away from the Holy Knackers, but if he was anything other than horselike, would this not be doing Our Saviour down?

Wouldst the Lord have a simple, modest dong? The Humble Cock of a Carpenter? For I mean, surely, He was Hung Like a Biggun'?

My vote goes for a massive, engorged, rock-hard, veiny super-cock on each and every jesus. After all, he's part of God, he's omniscient and omnipresent and all that, he's every bit of pornography, every brushed nipple, every pant stirring, every dirty thought that's happening in every mind, 24/7.

Frankly, I imagine that he'd have The Gush.

I mean, there's no reference to Christ's Fluffer in the bible.

Ah, man. Now I can't stop thinking about Jesus wanking. Go on, son! Crack out the Holy water!

I'm sorry that this is what I return to you all with after a busy week. I assure you that there will be music, wisdom, links and bile, but for now, and as long as I fail to dislodge it from my brain, you've got christ's turgid phallus, pulsing and bobbing ominously, like some kind of sacred meat-baton of infinite loving, poised before your eyes, ready to unleash a cascading torrent of angelic ball-juice while a choir sings 'Hosanna'.

That's something I want you to all think about for now.

aw, man

... and don't even get me started on God's pendulous bollocks!

Public Grief Junkie

You should buy things from these people. They brought us the "I hate dolphins / They are smug" and "Goths are Ridiculous" shirts*. Also, they have a stall in Camden, for your gothing purposes, goths.

If anyone tests out their assertion that their prices include postage to "anywhere on the entire planet", please let me know how that works out :)

*Though they seem to think that wasps make honey, which I think is only true as long as spiders make chutney.

TWF Magazine

The latest TWF Magazine features your friendly neighbourhood, web-slinging DeathBoy, the arch bandits History of Guns and those unmissable, irrepressible sound-perverts, Earth Loop Recall (who, if you missed the post, have an excellent new track available to download).

I was going to write a bit more, but Mick Mercer reviews the mag HERE and saves me much of the effort. Grab a copy it's a great read. :)

SongSlide

I've just put End of an Error on a new site called SongSlide.



This site's a bit novel in that it uses the idea that the music-buying public can pick the price that they pay for a track or an album.

Single Tracks:
$0.59 - Artist: $0.30 (50%) SongSlide: $0.29 (minimum)
$0.99 - Artist: $0.59 (60%) SongSlide: $0.40 (default)
$9.99 - Artist: $8.99 (90%) SongSlide: $1.00 (maximum)

Albums:
$6.99 - Artist: $3.50 (50%) SongSlide: $3.50 (minimum)
$9.99 - Artist: $6.21 (62.2%) SongSlide: $3.78 (default)
$99.99 - Artist: $89.99 (90%) SongSlide: $10.00 (maximum)

So, if you fancy one (or more) of the tracks at a price that you get a bit more control over, or if you're an artist and looking for a new place to sell your wares, since the death of Mperia.com, give it a look :)