(no subject)

Fucking fucking FUCKING FUCK

What I need, what I really totally need, absolutely most of all this morning, is to have a shrieking, INSANELY angry teething baby taking the fucking roof off with nightmarish, ear-splitting, military-grade SCREAMING and I cannot find a single fucking dummy in the whole FUCKING house (let alone a sterilized one). In the bed? No. In MY bed? No. Next to any of the beds? No. In the cot? No. In the play-cot? No. On the side, with ALL THE OTHER BABY THINGS NEXT TO THE STERLIZER? No. IN the sterilizer? That would be foolish, no. In the baby travel bag? No. WHERE? Fucking WHERE?!

I mean, where the FUCK does she PUT them? This happens all the fucking time.

Some days, this whole babying in the daytime lark makes me want to go and kick swans' faces off.

(no subject)

Well, that was quite pleasant.

'Just had some Jehovah's Witnesses round for an hour. Talked about the bible a lot, they were quite content with my contesting about three things in every paragraph of their pamphlet ("What does the Bible really teach us?"), which we got all of 10 pages into as we got derailed so often.

Poor lads seemed terribly pleased that I did in fact invite them in and have a natter. It was all a little bit like the scene in Black Books where Bernard invites the lads in to talk about Jesus (here, about half-way through), actually.

I'm interested to see how they talk about homosexuality, as JWs appear to be really quite against The Gays.

Sneakily recorded an mp3 of us talking, but as they were really quite chilled (I'm sure they will ramp things up in subsequent weeks), it's not actually very entertaining (unless you're a fan of listening to a brummie accent going on about cyclical arguments and a cockney agreeing, then repeating them).

They did try the odd Jedi Mind Trick, like getting me to read a few paragraphs of their pamphlet with them (I assume, the first step to us all reading the bible aloud together)... for my part, I intend to try to get them into drum and bass and playing the Wii.

On the up-side, Corben LOVED having new people and voices discussing things animatedly, and lay there giggling and gurgling and casually shitting himself. For an hour a week of happy baby-time, I may consider converting.